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A Series of Unfortunate Events

Did anyone actually expect that?

EU & GB

I’m not sure even the leave party thought it would happen, but happen it has and in a historic move, for better or worse the majority who voted want to leave the European Union.

Shock waves were felt almost immediately as the stock markets went in to freefall, David Cameron resigned, Boris and Gove appeared to back track almost instantly and Farage admitted that £350 million wont be going directly to the NHS.

It seems a hollow victory all round.

The division of public opinion has been swift and nasty, I for one am ashamed by the xenophobia that has risen in recent days. I thought we were better than this, the UK has long been a rich meeting point of cultures and traditions, do we really want to be rid of such wonderful things?

What was sold to many as a way to make Britain great and unified, has instead alienated those very people who help make Britain great. There is nothing great about a nation that turns its back on the people who helped build it.

There’s talk of Scotland, Gibraltar and Northern Ireland breaking away, making the United Kingdom not so united after all.

I don’t believe we should have been given the vote. Being asked to make such a momentous decision which will be felt for years to come, on the backs of two parties who fed us lies, half truths, manipulated statistics and propaganda was both irresponsible and negligent. We have all been duped to one degree or another; shady politicians once again putting their careers before the social, political and economic future of millions.

But the damage is done and will continue to unfold for a while to come, we’re on our own now, and we must find a way to thrive if not for ourselves then for our children who most definitely did not choose this as their future.

Can We Still Be Friends?

I’ve not long come in from voting, and already I’m wondering if I made the right choice. I hadn’t actually made a decision until my elbow was perched on the counter and I starred at the ballot paper. It was at that moment that Ethan walked up to me and I made my choice, with his future in mind.

Straight away I wondered if it was the right one.

stay or go

But mostly I just felt relieved, despite my years long interest in politics I’m done with this referendum. From the start I disliked the notion of a stay or go option. I always thought there should have been a third option, one in which we could have opted for a revamp of the European Union, as like with most things there are elements which don’t work and could be improved upon.

The entire referendum has devolved in to a farce, it has become so divisive and vitriolic that relationships not just between the UK and the rest of Europe have been tested but those to of once amiable people have been pushed to the limit.

The accusations of racism or Europhile depending on which way individuals were leaning have done nothing but reduce what should have been an opportunity for us to educate ourselves on what the EU actually is, what it does and what it could do to nothing more than a mockery of what should be the most important vote of a generation.

At this point it seem both sides would argue the toss over whether water is wet.

Just over 4 hours to go before the ballots are counted and our choice announced, and I’m wondering, which ever way it goes, if when we wake up in the morning can we still be friends?

Progress and Stability

Have you ever been so excited that you end up flapping your arms, feet fidgeting whilst on the verge of screaming with incoherent excitement?

Well, I’m there and it’s amazing.

As you may or may not know I reduced my antidepressants to one every 2 days, I’ve recently reduced them again to one every 3 days. And I’m doing good, great even.

antidepressants and my coffee

I’ve not had any of the physical side effects which I experienced when I tried this a few years ago, those were nasty and definitely not something I want to experience again.

But more importantly I’m coping.

I’m feeling emotions and processing them in a healthy way. One of the things I most hate about depression is the lack of feeling, good or bad, it’s like a universal numbness.

Unless you’ve experienced not feeling emotions and I sincerely hope you never go through that, you can’t quite grasp just how amazing it is to be laughing so hard you have tears running down your face.

It’s amazing.

I think in general we take happiness or contentment at least for granted, we just assume our lows will eventually be lifted and we’ll be back to being a person feeling joy. But it’s not always that easy, and as well meaning as those memes and positivity sayings are, something being happy is harder than you think.

Having been at such a low point for several years, I hope never to take my happiness nor contentment for granted.

Even better is that my children have started to comment on how happy I am, as much as we tried to shield them from my depression they aren’t silly and they did notice mummy wasn’t always “there”. Knowing that my children can see how happy I am being their mummy is possibly the best feeling in the world.

YOUR NAME HERE

Adding Colour

Being a parent comes with lots of responsibility, but one of my most favourite aspects of parenting is how childish I get to be. I probably didn't act like so much such a goofball before having children as I do now. It’s amazing how interacting with Ahren and Ethan, from conversations on kidnapping monkeys to being a space pilot wearing a fish bowl, to jumping in puddles and blowing raspberries on bellies can lighten my mood.

paint and brushes

On a miserable Sunday where we were stuck indoors and rocking our pjs I had the “brilliant” idea of painting Ahren. Not in the sitting down and doing a portrait way, but actually painting him.

He became our living canvas as it were.

painted Ahren

Thankfully all the paint came off once he had a bath not sure how we’d have explained this Monday morning to his teacher.

With all the upsetting events dominating the news these past few weeks it’s lovely to be able to switch it all off and remember there is innocent and carefree fun to be had in this world.

Happy and Home at A Residence blog

A Measure of Time

When I think of ‘classic’ I think of old cars, books written by Charles Dickens and Jane Eyre and music my parents listened to.

truck-238523_1920 old-books-436498_1920 acoustic-guitar-336479_1920

At no point have I ever considered something I enjoyed during my youth being considered ‘classic’, at least not until I was reminiscing with the great grandkids about mosh pits and pints of snakebite & black.

Surely I’m not that old!

But apparently I am. I somehow stumbled upon an article on classic rock music, I expected to see Eagles, Led Zeppelin, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Fleetwood Mac and anyone who was at Woodstock, what I didn’t expect to see were the songs which were realised during and helped shape my somewhat misguided young adult life.

Bands like Foo Fighters, Green Day, Pearl Jam and Red Hot Chili Peppers all now featured along side AC/DC and The Who.

It’s an odd feeling, realising you are growing older and that those things you once enjoyed as fresh, new and innovative are now relegated to a period in history considered classic.

It made me want to crank up some Metallica and Pantera whilst I reminisce about the ‘good ol’ days’ before I realised that I’m old enough to not only say but actually have ‘good ol’ days’ to reminisce about.

Growing up is weird.

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