Recent Posts

Why We Need International Men's Day

There’s this assumption that men have it easy. That being born with a penis somehow makes life wonderful, easy and free from any kind of issues.

But it doesn’t; as a daughter, sister, friend, mother and partner I’ve seen first-hand the struggles that men go through all whilst being told to “man up” and keep quiet.

I’ve seen my dad succumb to alcoholism and attempt suicide; left to flounder after the death of his first born child he was adrift in depression, there was nothing and no one to help him. As an ex-squaddie he was expected to “be a man” and just deal with the cards dealt to him, but how on earth does one deal with the death of a child without support?

I’ve seen friends battle homelessness as they were the wrong gender to be accepted into shelters whilst I was offered all sorts of help when I found myself without a place to call home.

Whilst I battled through mental health issues I was offered so much support it became overwhelming, at the same time my partner was at best ignored and at worst told to be quiet and “man up and deal with it”.

Men are abused, victimised and find themselves in situations where they need support to find their feet just like women do, yet unlike women they are expected to “be a man” and just get on with life.

But rape, violence, suicide, bullying, mental health issues, domestic abuse, homelessness and drug abuse are not issues from which one can simply walk away from unscathed without support.

We women know this, which is why we’ve fought so hard to have support systems in place, you’d think, with so many of us knowing first hand how hard life can be when dealing with such issues that we’d extend a helping hand to those who are vulnerable and need support, regardless of their gender.

This gap in support offered to vulnerable men is why we need International Men's Day.


Silent Sunday

What a week, there is no sense to be made of the many senseless acts of violence which have happened around the world this week; Baghdad, Beirut and Paris to name but a few.

I took this photo Friday morning thinking how wonderful all the sunbeams were, it amazes me that a day which started with such promise and beauty can descend in to such ugliness and horror.

sunbeams over the pier


Woodworking Progress

I think we all need a creative outlet; at the moment mine happens to be woodworking.

I first realised that I need something of a creative nature about a year or so after I got my depression and PTSD diagnoses, whilst I wouldn’t have suggested sharp chisels and knives I’m glad that my creative endeavours have led me to woodworking.

I’ve been dabbling in woodworking for just under a year and am so far enjoying the bejinkos out of it. It’s the sort of thing, which if you asked me about a few years ago, I’d have laughed at, but now, I’m pretty sure it’s something I will be dabbling with for years to come.

For someone who is self taught, thank you You Tube, I’m surprised at how my confidence has grown.

These are some of my latest makes, and yes I guess this is totally me showing off. IT may seem self indulgent, but I’ve spent years feeling worthless and less than, so when I find something which makes me feel proud about myself, I shall indeed share it.



6 bowls




Along side woodturning, I’ve started dabbling in wood burning and wood carving, both of which are much harder than I thought but no less interesting.


wood burning

IMG_20151022_152440 (1)

It’s all to easy to fall in to the trap of thinking you’re worthless and not good at anything when depression and anxiety take over, it’s nice to be able to prove myself wrong.


spoon carving


Learning To Love The Night–Time Wake Ups

One of the biggest sacrifices you make when becoming a parent is the amount of sleep you get; night feeds, cleaning up vomit, nappy changes, cuddles, administering drugs, worries and early wake ups  are all things which chip away at those hours of slumber.

I’m not going to lie, for the longest time I was rather resentful of how quickly the children were able to nod back off whilst I’d lay there waiting for sleep that never arrived. It was totally irrational of me, but lack of sleep rarely makes for logical thoughts!

As the years have progressed the night-time wake ups have grown fewer and further between, and now instead of  harbouring resentment I've learnt to cherish those few moments when only mama will do. Realising there will soon come a time when they no long wake at random hours wanting to check their parents are still close by has made me appreciate the fact that I'm still needed, as they say, there is a silver lining in everything, you just need to look for it.

I thought I would share with you some of the more comical 3.47am wake up calls I’ve received recently, these are all Ethan, Ahren is like his mama and loves his sleep.

“Mummy, mummy, muuuuumeeee, I love you”

This was incredibly sweet, if not for the fact he was asleep before his head hit the pillow whilst I was cursing up a storm after tripping over my shoes, stubbing my toe on the door and stepping on Lego.

“Mummy, MUMMY! Can I have bacon for dinner?”

This wasn’t so sweet, he still had breakfast, lunch, snacks and scavenging to go before dinner and he was already making demands, plus it totally had me craving a bacon sandwich.

“Mummy, mummy it’s dark when I close my eyes”

I really wanted to respond with ‘No shit’ but I refrained and tucked him back in bed where he promptly fell asleep.

“Mummy, mummy I had a dream a tarantula was crawling up my arm”

This one was just urgh, I hate spiders and putting this thought in my head ensured sleep was no longer a possibility or I’d be the one waking up screaming for my mummy!

But the “best” middle of the night wake ups from my boys are when they want the loo, not only do they want me to turn the light on for them, but they want me to “stay and chat for a while” which I do, because no parent loves anything more than trying to get their kid who fell asleep on the loo back in bed!

bro hugs

Silent Sunday

poppies by the pier

This was taken on a warmer and sunnier day.

I can’t help but think of my dad and other family members and friends who have served the armed forces whenever I see poppies, this pic seemed apt for this Remembrance Sunday.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
09 10