A little bit broken

I wish there was a guide as to how to deal with life after depression.

I’m feeling a little lost, a bit broken and a whole heap of befuddlement.

broken

After enduring 7 years of my own personal hell….this is it?

I don’t know what I was expecting, I never expected to get here so I’m not real sure as to what I’m supposed to do. Get on with life obviously, but it’s been stagnant for so damn long that I’m not sure where to start.

I want to start a business for my woodturning, I need to focus more on my health and relationships. I’m learning how be a parent again. I need to find my confidence and self worth.

But I’m at a loss as to where to begin.

My interaction skills are awful, stilted and still at the mercy of anxiety attacks. How do I adult when I can’t talk to adults?

I thought the hard part was over, but really it seems like it’s just beginning.

I’ve got another chance at life in a way, one I can’t afford to waste, yet here I am…stuck at the starting line.

Depression was in a way a safe place, an excuse for letting things slide and not giving it my all.

I don’t have and hope to never have those excuses again, but getting a jump start on living outside of the fog of depression is bewildering and rather terrifying.

No one told me, there was no advice on what to do. I know I should just do something, but when I spent years barely functioning that something now seems momentous.

I’m feeling a little bit broken.

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